Practical Guidance About Love, Sex and Marriage

About the Book

The cover shows a picture of my daughter and her husband’s wedding rings and bouquet. This is only a relevant choice since in my first book, I gave advice to young people about marriage and courtship. My daughter Jessica met her husband, David, over three years ago, but it is such a fairy-tale story that I had to share a little of it with the reader. So many times, young people feel trapped by peer pressure to engage in promiscuous activities before engagement and marriage. I read that the unwed mothers’ rate has doubled, according to statistics. Google states that statistics from the Mississippi Department of Health states that the overall rate of births to unwed mothers was 54.7 percent in 2010. It was 28 percent in 1980. Dig a little deeper into this report, and the numbers become downright scary. Thirteen counties reported unwed birth rates of over 75 percent. Looking at these statistics, there seems to be a decline in God’s moral principle of chastity. For a young couple to start a marriage as both couple being virgins seems to be pretty rare. That is one reason I wanted to share this about David and Jessica—to encourage others to not be promiscuous during their courtship. As I stated earlier, David and Jessica have known each other over three years. They met in the church. Our church has an orchestra. They both played instruments in the orchestra. They were very young when they met. Neither one had an idea that one day God would put them both together as husband and wife. They both desired an educational mastery to be successful in life. Like Solomon, I guess you can say they sought wisdom and knowledge. They waited until they required mastery in knowledge before they decided to settle down and get married. Our youth today seems not to be asking for proficiency in wisdom and knowledge, but the youth, according to statistics I read earlier, are becoming adults before they have matured in the mastery of wisdom and knowledge. I am so glad that Jessica and David waited and was not promiscuous during their courtship, but followed God’s standard for a holy and righteous life. Sure, young people may make mistakes, but it is our job as Christian adults to not abuse them but to train them to respect God’s way and principles. I believe that even if we train our children in righteousness and they later depart, it will remain with them in life (Prov. 22: 6), and it will cause them to return to God in honest and true confessions to God from the heart. God is looking on the heart of people. He doesn’t care about our outward adorning, but he does care about our heart. For God knows whether or not we’re just and honest or living in hypocrisy and sin. I just believe if we acknowledge God in all our ways even when we’re young we can avoid many pitfalls in life. Young people live pure and righteous lives before God and like David and Jessica, and my husband and I, you can experience wedded bliss and happiness. “For he who findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord” (Prov. 18:22).

About the Author

Mrs. Bays was born April 16, 1958, in Tate County, Mississippi. She is the seventh of nine siblings. She married at age 24 to Mr. Willie George Bays Jr. She is the mother of four children. Mrs. Bays was saved at age 10 or 11; she was a member of Independence Missionary Baptist Church in Tyro, Mississippi. In the month of February in 1977, she embraced the teaching of the Church of God in Christ and later joined Christ Temple COGIC in Holly Springs, Mississippi. In Holly Springs, she served under Evangelist Albert Pass. Mrs. Bays is a graduate of Mississippi Valley State University, with a BS degree in elementary education 4–8. She also acquired an elementary education license for K–3 from DSU after attending their summer school programs. In 1980, Mrs. Bays became a part of the St. James Temple Church of God in Christ family of Clarksdale, Mississippi. She is presently serving at St. James under the leadership of Bishop T. T. Scott, prelate of the Northern Mississippi jurisdiction of the Church of God in Christ. Mrs. Bays has served under him for thirty-five years. She has attended the Charles Harrison Mason Bible School seminars and received an evangelist missionary license from the school. She is currently enrolled with Liberty University Online School. She is attending to acquire a master of divinity in theology. Upon her graduation in 2018, she plans to reenroll and acquire her doctorate from Liberty University. Mrs. Bays is a giver and lover of God and his people. She has learned to be blessed in every area of life and gives God the glory for the great things and the miracles performed in and through her life. Her children are Joy, George, Jocelyn Bays, and Jessica Dixon. Mrs. Bays believes in helping all children, even those who are not hers. She has taught small children as well as adults and believes that if you have your backpack full, you will never be unhappy. Mrs. Bays loves children, young and old.