Explosive-Cargo: A 3rd Helpin'

About the Book

This is supposed to be a longer summary of this book. It's supposed to run multiple thousands of words long and provide you with sparkling witticisms,  intelligent aphorisms, mighty maxims, profound punditry,  cute quips, insightful insights, fine old adages,  and other good stuff like that.

Guess what? I'm not doing any of it. That's cause I'm extra short of aphorisms this week. Fact is, truth be told, and in all honesty,  I'm not sure what one is. Sounds like something your spray on rubber trees for aphids.  And then afterwards the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Invertebrates comes and removes your kneecaps with a butter knife. So we're not going there.  I like my kneecaps. I've grown attached to them. And vice versa.

Where was I? Oh, yes, I'm not going into detail here 'cause there isn't really a whole lot to say. This is the third collection of essays from my ezine, explosive-cargo. Most of the material here dates from 1994 and 1995, with the exception of the final essay, "Thinking About Barbarella," which is a bit more recent, going back only to 1998. (I wrote that one as one of two sample chapters for a book I was going to do on "Zippers," films too good to miss, but too awful to sit through. But that's why God invented the fast forward button.)

Anyway, I've been doing explosive-cargo for about six years now (I write this in 2001). It goes out via email, once a week (if possible) to anyone who wants it. I've also started collecting the essays and packaging them as books. There two more excargo tomes before this one -- "explosive-cargo: The Absurd Origins Issue" and "explosive-cargo: Duck And Cover." Other titles are on their way. So check 'em out at you local web-based bookseller. Have that credit card handy. Operators are standing by. Well, actually, I suppose they're sitting. But we won't go into that. I'm afraid it'll involve aphids.

And, that, basically,  sums up everything I've got to say on this book. I'm going to shut up now. Think how lucky you are. Why, my friends and family have been praying I'd do something like that for years. And here I'm giving it to you for gratis.

So never say I never did anything for you.

Onward and upward.

About the Author

Michael Jay Tucker, in addition to being the alleged author of this purported book, is the diseased intelligence behind explosive-cargo, a highly opinionated ezine which has been losing friends and annoying people since 1994. He is also a trade press journalist and has co-authored three books on a variety of technical topics. He lives in the Boston-area with his wife and son, and a West Highland White Terrier of extremely strong opinions.