Sick World

Sarah stirred awake at about 11:15 P.M. She was in quite a bit of pain. As she rolled over, she noticed someone walking out of her room and shutting the door. “Nurse?” she called. There was no response. Sarah was shocked by the pain that she felt, she pushed the call button. “Can I help you?” a voice asked over the speaker. “Can I get something for pain please? And I think that it is time to feed my baby.” "I'll be in after my rounds," the nurse replied with a slightly irritated tone in her voice as though Sarah was an inconvenience. Sarah waited for what seemed to be thirty minutes or more, while her pain increased in intensity. Finally, the nurse came in her room with some Tylenol. “Were you in here checking on me a bit ago?” Sarah asked. “No,” replied the nurse. “Oh well, it must have been one of the other nurses.” Sarah was shocked when the nurse told her that she had been the only nurse on the floor since the shift change at 11 P.M. The nurse was puttering around the room checking machines and making notes. Sarah could sense that the nurse was efficient, but didn't really want to be here. She looked tired and bothered, as if her job was keeping her from something more important. Sarah wondered who it had been that she had seen leaving her room? She didn’t say anything more to the nurse about it. “Can I have my baby now?” she asked the nurse reluctantly, not wanting to add more interruption to her night. The nurse sighed, “I will check with the nursery, and bring him down to you in a few minutes.” Sarah felt frustrated and upset. She felt as though the nurse was going to take her sweet time getting Eric, Jr. for her. ”What does she care?” , Sarah thought to herself as she lie back in her bed and waited for the medicine to take effect. Soon she had dozed off again. Sarah awoke with a sudden jerk, and saw another lady standing over her baby, who was in his clear plastic bassinet next to her bed. The nurse must have rolled him in when she was asleep and left him by her, not wanting to disturb her. This other woman was in a robe and slippers, her eyes were red and swollen as if she had been crying a lot. She was looking down at Eric, Jr. while softly caressing his chest. Sarah heard a sob come from her. “Who are you?” Sarah asked softly but warily. “I saw them kill my baby,” the other lady said as she softly rubbed Eric, Jr.’s chest. Sarah’s heart was in her throat in an instant. She sat up quickly and pulled her baby’s bassinet to her. Reaching in, she picked Eric, Jr. up and cradled him in her arms. “What do you mean?” Sarah asked. The other mother sobbed some more, then replied, “My baby was pink and healthy and crying when she was born. They placed her on my belly and I felt her strength. There was nothing wrong with her. Then they put that poison in her and I watched as the life drained from her. She cried at first just like any baby would do, and then she just went limp." She paused for a moment while she sobbed, then she continued. "I called to the nurse, and they took her to the nursery right away. I laid there while they sewed me up and wondered what was going on with my little girl. I kept asking about her but they just said that they were working on her and she would be fine. Finally after I had been moved into my room, the doctor came in to talk with my husband and I. “I’m sorry”. He said, “Your baby girl did not make it. Her lungs could not expand, and we were unable to save her.” I know he was lying. I know that my little girl’s lungs were perfect.” She broke out in an uncontrollable sob. Sarah sat there filled with pity and compassion for this poor broken hearted lady that she didn’t even know. She did not know what to say. “Why did they kill my baby?!” she asked sobbing. “I’m so sorry for your loss,” Sarah said with warmth, “I’m sure that they didn’t kill your little girl on purpose, though. Why would they do that?” “It’s the poison that they put in her. That’s what killed her.” The woman said with odium in her voice. Sarah could see the change in her countenance and the rage building up inside this poor woman. She held her son tightly against her chest. “You were lucky” she said, “Your baby survived. But you better not let them keep giving him those poisons or something will happen to him also. You need to keep your baby safe,” the woman said as she broke into another sob. Sarah got up and placed Eric in his bassinet, then lovingly put her arms around this poor grieving stranger. Just then a nurse came in the room. “Mrs. Rasmussen! There you are. We have been worried about you,” the nurse said while she reached for a small Black Hand held communication device on her lanyard. “I found Mrs. Rasmussen, she is in room 406,” she announced on her small handheld device. This was the same nurse that Sarah had spoken to earlier. ”I bet that she is really upset now,” Sarah thought to herself. ”I mean, how dare this lady interrupt my game of Solitaire just because her baby died?!” Sarah thought with sarcasm and disgust. “Mrs. Rasmussen, you need to come back to your room. It’s time for your medication.” the nurse said. Mrs. Rasmussen turned from Sarah’s embrace and screamed at the nurse. “No! You are not giving me anymore of your poison!” The nurse pushed a button on her handheld and then approached Mrs. Rasmussen. Sarah quickly pushed Eric’s bassinet to the other side of the bed and stood in front of him. “Mrs. Rasmussen, we are not giving you poison. We just want to help you stay calm so that you don’t hurt yourself.” Two male nurses walked through the door just then. A mixture of fear and rage filled Mrs. Rasmussen’s eyes as she screamed and tried to run through the nurse and the two men to get to the door. They easily restrained her while they gave her an injection in her arm. Within a few seconds, she was limp and calm and unable to stand on her own. The two male nurses gently helped her into a wheel chair that was waiting in the hallway. “I’m sorry for that Mrs. Dunn” the nurse said. “I don’t know if I would take losing a child any differently than she. Can I get you anything?” “No thank you, I’m fine.” Sarah was shaking inside, and could hardly hold herself together. She was also shocked at the apparent show of sympathy from the nurse. Eric, Jr. started to cry, and she turned to him and picked him up. As she sat in her quiet, dimly-lit room nursing her baby boy, she felt frightened and alone. She longed for her husband to come and take her home. Sarah could not get the image of that poor woman out of her mind, and that made her think of her own mother. Sarah had been raised by her Dad. She was an only child, and grew up happy and loved, yet without a mother. Shortly after her birth her parents divorced, and she never heard from or even saw her mother. She didn't even know her name. Sarah grew up in a lower middle class household. Her Dad, Ben, was not an educated man, but he had learned a trade early in life and worked in a sheet metal factory. He had been employed by the same company since graduating from high school. Sarah's dad worked long hours sometimes, and at other times he hardly worked at all. There were about three times in her life that her dad was out of work for a short period of time due to lay-offs. But Ben was very frugal, and he managed his money wisely. Therefore, Sarah never went without, nor did she ever really want for things. Sarah's Aunt Betsy, her father's older sister, was like a surrogate mother to Sarah. She was the one that helped her through those very important "girl moments" growing up, and Sarah loved her aunt Betsy very much. In her late teens, Sarah asked her Dad about her Mom again. He said that she was trying to hurt Sarah, by not getting her vaccinated.