Happy New Millennium

With no experience in this sort of menial work, I soon discovered I had not put in the correct amount of hot water into the bucket to offset the grimy filth coming off the wall. The white soapy water had quickly turned into one nasty looking brown color so I wheeled my yellow bucket back out and into our kitchen sink area. Searching the shelf above the sink, I realized we had run out of ammonia. Remembering my mother used various other liquids to clean our house, I grabbed the bleach without hesitation and began mixing it in with the hot water and soap – and whatever ammonia was left within the bucket. Cleaning solutions are cleaning solutions, correct? Not long after the first minute of applying my brand new cleaning concoction to the wall, a strange white film started to appear on the restroom tiles. I assumed my new mixture was really doing the job and the white film would soon evaporate as the surface dried. However, something unexpected began to happen. My ability to breathe was being compromised while my eyes were beginning to burn a bit. Had I possibly added too much bleach? Dragging the bucket outside once again, I added in some more water and soap and proceeded back into the McRestroom once again. A few minutes later into my diligent scrubbing, the fumes inside grew even stronger. Because my brain wasn’t working right, I worked even faster and decided not to worry about what was happening to my body. I just wanted to be done. Before I knew it, a burning sensation followed from deep inside my throat, as if someone was pouring acid into my lungs. The walls still had the weird white residue but I didn’t care. I had to get out of this death chamber. Emptying out the bucket into the kitchen sink, I stumbled outside the back of the restaurant, gasping for air. I could not believe the bleach was so much more powerful than the ammonia. This situation was not worth the crappy $3.35 an hour they were paying me. Pedro, who was walking up from the basement with a giant box of napkins in his hand, had no idea of why I was leaning out the rear kitchen door as I continued to cough steadily. “You can’t keep the back door open,” said Pedro. “Are you done with the bathroom? And what’s with all the coughing?” “I couldn’t finish it. That cleaning stuff is so strong. I did the best I could,” I said. “Too strong? What are you talking about?” as Pedro pulled me back inside the store. “Go see for yourself,” I said. Pedro headed over to the bathroom and seconds later, I could hear my supervisor cursing up a McStorm. “How much friggin’ ammonia did you pour in that bucket?” said Pedro as he angrily walked back in my direction. “Not much at all. I already had the ammonia in there. So after the ammonia ran out, I added some bleach in.” Pedro put his hand over his face. “Come over here,” said Pedro as he took down the bleach bottle and showed me the bold print on the back of the container: WARNING! DO NOT MIX BLEACH WITH HOUSEHOLD CLEANERS. Some household cleaners contain ammonia. If ammonia is mixed with chlorine bleach, a toxic gas can form. This toxic gas can result serious injury or death. How about that! Ammonia and bleach can create a toxic McReaction – my own homemade version of chlorine gas, which was used quite effectively as a chemical weapon during World War I. By pouring the bleach on top of the ammonia, I had been covering the restaurant with poison. The windowless space made things considerably worse, as the potentially deadly fumes had absolutely nowhere to go but into my lungs and any future customers. “Put these two together and you’ll kill yourself ‘cause there’s no windows. Didn’t you notice you couldn’t breathe?” “Well, not right away,” I said. “Not right away…unbelievable,” said Pedro as he started scratching his head. Had I been in there any longer, my supervisor was probably realizing he would have had to be the one giving me mouth-to-mouth McResuscitation. How disturbing would it have been for me to have locked lips with my boss on my first week at work!