The Navigator Series: Career Moves

Coping with Your Emotions during a Job Transition Denial • symptoms: shock, denial, hurt • solution: crisp, clean cut. During this stage, you may feel that what has happened is not real. Your job loss may seem like a bad dream you cannot wake up from or some type of mistake. If you have been given notice of your impending job loss but will be continuing to work until your release date, you may even continue to focus on your work and refuse to acknowledge that your position is actually ending. Anger • symptoms: anger, hate, bitterness, resentment • solution: giving vent to your emotions, rites of reconciliation. During this stage, you may feel as if you have been treated unfairly and blame others for the situation. You may question why this has happened to you instead of someone else. You may find yourself lashing out at others, having a short temper, or overreacting to things that previously did not bother you. Bargaining • symptoms: shock, denial, hurt • solution: crisp, clean cut. During this stage, you may realise your position will be ending, but you may try to bargain the terms either externally with your supervisor or internally with yourself. You may try to negotiate, make a deal on how you could be different, and/or agree to do whatever would be required, if only you could stay in your current position. Depression • symptoms: self-doubt, guilt, depression, blame, and shame • solution: the uniqueness of you, what you are thankful for. During this stage, you may grieve the loss of your job and what it has meant to you. You may feel like part of you and the way you defined yourself is gone. You may be terrified of the financial and personal consequences of your job loss and feel the situation is hopeless and will never improve. Feelings of loneliness, emptiness and isolation are common during this stage. You may not see the point of getting out of bed, showering, eating and hygiene routines. You may find you do not obtain as much pleasure from activities you used to enjoy, experience crying spells and have difficulty concentrating. Acceptance • symptoms: resolution • solution: bouncing back, how high. During this stage, you allow yourself to acknowledge what has happened, realise you will not be going back to your position, and recognise you are the only one who can take action to change your current situation. You may begin to envisage yourself in a new work environment and feel hopeful things will eventually get better. The Grief Cycle: Coping Strategies While the passage of time often resolves the range of feelings experienced after a loss, there are coping strategies that can assist you with this process. One of the best ways to deal with the stressors associated with job loss is to develop a stress management action plan that focuses on the six major areas of self-care. This is a good time to take a practical look at some of your life habits and make adjustments. Diet What are your eating habits? Are you eating too much or too little? Do you find yourself eating a lot of sweets or drinking too much caffeine or alcohol? Remember, alcohol is a depressant, which means it can disrupt our balance, affecting our thoughts, feelings, and actions—and sometimes our long-term mental health. Sleep Do you get sufficient rest every night? Are you maintaining a normal sleep schedule? Do you find that you are having a hard time sleeping? Consider writing your thoughts down in a journal before you go to sleep as a way to free your mind of burdens. Exercise Are you getting enough physical activity every week? Are there ways that you could incorporate exercise into your life? Consider walking as an easy and economical option. Spirituality Do you take time every day to be silent and get in touch? One might practise meditation. Meditation is a precise technique for resting the mind and attaining a state of consciousness that is totally different from the normal waking state. The benefit of meditation includes: o Anxiety decreases. o Emotional stability improves. o Creativity increases. o Happiness increases. o Intuition develops. o Clarity and peace of mind are gained. o Problems become smaller. Time Management Learn how to manage your time well. Now is an important time to set shorter, more easily attainable goals and to reward yourself when they are achieved. You may wish to volunteer to work on a cause that you believe in. Mental Health Surround yourself with positive, encouraging people. Do you have a supportive network of friends or a support group with whom you can share your feelings? Also, try to look at your job loss as an opportunity to make your life better than it used to be. Since no job is perfect, there are probably some aspects of your last job you will not miss. Think about the negative aspects of the position that you are leaving. It is also important to remember that job loss is survivable. You will get through it. The most important thing to remember is to let yourself experience your emotions without judgement. Treat yourself with care and kindness, and you will soon be on your way to your next position. ‘Suck it up princess’ and ‘Take a couple of concrete pills and harden up’ are probably not what you want to hear or say to yourself right now.