Watching Maria

About the Book

In the early summer of 1996, Brian Keller spends his free time sitting on the edge of a San Diego community pool, passing the time in meaningless conversation with his friend, Dan Flemming.  Brian feels detached from his life and is always waiting for something to happen; for another day to pass, another shift at work, another year in school.  He does not expect much from life, and no one in his life has ever expected much from him.

Maria Connor, a friend of Dan’s, stops by the pool during a quiet July evening and quickly occupies Brian’s attention.  They begin a relationship based on listening to each other’s stories, working their way up to confessions of their darkest moments.  Spread out on the sands of La Jolla Shores in the heat of July, Maria tells Brian why she is in pain.

“He grabbed me by the shirt and pushed me down onto the bed.  He told me that I didn’t understand; that it was his right to have sex with me.  He pulled my skirt off, then my panties, and threw them onto the floor.  I tried to push him off as he reached to unhook my bra, but he pinned my arms back and slapped me across the face.  When he finished undressing me, he told me to lie there and stay still.  He moved to the corner of his room and undressed quickly.  He stood there - hairy and naked - looking at me, becoming aroused.  I want to think that during that pause, he was trying to talk himself out of what he was planning to do.  But I know he was just trying to build up the courage to continue.  As he started walking toward me, it almost seemed as if his light brown chest hair was turning wispy and red.  When he got on top of me, I clenched my fists and closed my eyes.  Then he raped me.”

Maria tries to leave her tortured past behind and improve her life.  She reestablishes friendships, applies to college, and begins to express intimacy.  As Maria grows, Brian fades in the relationship; he realizes that as she heals, he must struggle to remain relevant in her life.

About the Author