Artificial Turf

About the Book

Artificial Turf is a comedy of the good old days of football heroes, beauty queens, pompous professors, and the first signs of women’s lib. Brilliant halfback Dane McLane longs to be All-American. His coach, the Big Bad Wolf, longs to coach in the NFL and is married to a psychic/astrologer who can predict his wins and losses—but won’t tell. He turns to the speech-writing professor William the Punctuator to help him upgrade his image and totally forgets to give McLane the ball. The reluctant beauty queen, Dwight D. Mankiewtiz, renamed “Dede Brown” by her overly sexual campaign manager, meets Dane and helps him plot to attract the attention of the press (plan A), change the coach’s game plan (plan B), and change the game of football (plan C) forever. In the end, everyone’s dreams come true with a little manipulation here and there.

About the Author

Professor and humor writer Douglas Taylor attended Penn State, Gettysburg College, and the University of Florida back in the good old days. At each school, he was housed among the athletes, gaining materials and inspiration for Football in America. At Florida, he earned his pilot’s license, leading to his hilarious aviation best seller, How to Pilot an Aeroplane, and zany humor column, Dear Ace, in General Aviation News. Between colleges, he also worked in construction (The Reactor) and worked part-time in sports for the Memphis Commercial Appeal. He and his wife, artist Catherine Wright Taylor, have published two children’s books: Thanksgiving and Downtown Ducks.